Our children are not ours! They belong to God. We are only caretakers of them for a few years. God places the responsibility for the care and training upon us. We shall be held accountable. It is not a burden. Their is so much joy in this time. It is not easy, but it is fulfilling. In your old age, You shall be a happy person if you have raised loving and responsible children. They will be there for you, as you were for them.
I prayed a lot for God’s guidance. Before I was called to Christ, I was a yelling, and angry parent sometimes. I was young, selfish and doing most things wrong in my life. I was living with Bob, Richard’s dad. We married when Richard was about 1 year old. In time, after reading this book and applying the teaching,( plus I was learning at church), my way of raising my son changed.
My son changed too. No longer was he so willful and rebellious. He became and is today a pleasure to all he is around. He is strong willed, but it is always focused in a right way, and he knows self control. He puts his life in God’s hands and walks in faith. My children are a blessing and not a curse. They are a blessing to me of untold magnitude. It was a hard journey at times. The way to Godly peace with your children is not to get out of the trials you find yourselves in, but to see God in it all.
Lift up your children to God every morning and night. Pray with them when they are small. Daily, read and discuss God’s way of living. Teach the blessing of a life with God. Even if you must reduce your standard of living, so that you can spend more time with them, it is 100% worth it. Time invested in the teaching and training of your child is worth more than money can buy. It will be the best investment when you are old and grey.
When You Child Fails
A crucial part of being there for your child will be how you respond when they screw up.
They break your favorite vase when playing, they do not bring home the “A” you think they should have at school. They steal something when hanging out with some wrong friends.
Now is a time of great discernment. Was the failure a deliberate and intentional error? Or was it a accident. Did they knowingly disobey a direct family rule? Were they pressured into something?
A child will try to live up to your expectations. If you expect him to fail, he will. But sometimes they are trying to live up to expectations we could not reach at that age. Even if we did, how do you know your child can? Each child is a individual. If they do wrong, it is our responsibility to find out why and to HELP them overcome. None of us our perfect in any way. We must know our own infallibility's before we can have compassion on others. A child must be urged to overcome and do well, but not at the cost of them becoming with poor self image.
Learn to apologize to your child when you screw up. Yes, apologize! Tell them how sorry you are, and that it was wrong for you to act that way. By doing this you will have just taught your child one of life's most important lessons. That we all make mistakes, and as a family how to respond to mistakes. This will be the glue that binds your relationship with your child. Just another key to a lasting and loving relationship in families. It is another way NOT to abandon your child to wrong thinking.
We abandon our children every day in some way. Make sure it is corrected and spend more time learning how to be a better full time parent. Even in this age, we can stay in contact through video cams, cell phones, and making time, to be with our kids. Know what is affecting them. Pray for them every day. Pray with them every day when they are still young. The rest is up to God. But at least you will be able to say to God on judgment day, you did the best you could.